Friday, December 07, 2007

Christmas Prep

Jolly Jester was super pumped when our Christmas tree arrived. He's all about the real tree idea. He's right - it's worth the shedding needles and the chore of watering it everyday. It's really a small price to pay to have a real live tree in your livingroom.

Bill and Jester are all about Christmas baking. Nothing says 'Merry Christmas' in that old fashioned way like a decorated sugar cookie. If you are priviledged enough to eat one of our custom decorated cookies I can't guarantee that there won't be some saliva on it.

There was some discussion going on at the table as to what is the right amount of sprinkles to put on the cookie. Bill was adament about it. You can't be stingy on the sprinkles. Jester on the other hand says it is possible to have too much of a good thing. Bill then accused Jester of just saying that because he personally wanted to consume any sprinkles that we didn't use for decorating. Ya know, I think Bill was right. Jester did consume a large amount of sprinkles.

We all know that snow removal is a big part of the Christmas season. Bill loves getting out there to shovel the driveway. Bill has this amazing quality to be enthusiastic and optimistic pretty much all the time. This really helps him out in the snow removal department. I know most people have a 'bahumbug' attitude towards shovelling.....But not Bill. All I can say is treasures in Heaven for Bill, treasures in Heaven.

As for Jester.....Well, hopefully he'll get treasure in Heaven for watching Bill shovel.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

La Target Boutique

Me and my G.F.'s headed south over the border to G.F. Our first stop was Target. We were all hungry for lunch but sometimes you must sacrifice to shop. Even my 8 month pregnant sis was willing to sacrifice eating lunch and head straight into Target and that says something. It speaks of a deep commitment. Target, we pledge our allegiance to you.

If only me and my G.F.'s could stay overnight in G.F. That way we could devote an entire day to strolling through Target's isles. But no, we only had 12 hours. And Target could only take a portion of the time. It felt so unfair. I almost felt like I owed Target an apology.

So we stormed through Target's doors. We collaborated. What was our strategy going to be? It had to be precise and efficient. Then we got sidetracked by the $1.00 display. Crystal found some gift bags (and took several minutes deciding which color to buy), Heather found some cool wooden toys for the twins, Tiffany looked just plain ol' overwhelmed, and me? I headed straight to the gift wrap. You can't go wrong with a roll of gift wrap for $1.00.

I can hardly even remember what happened after that. Once in a while I would randomly bump into one of my G.F.'s while wandering through Target. "Oh hey!" we'd say to each other, "Check this out!" or "What do you think about this?" or "Should I get this?" or "You should REALLY get that." We tried to forget about the duty we would have to pay at the border. We tried REALLY hard to forget about that. And we did.

In total we spent a glorious 3 hours in Target. I felt a little rushed. I didn't get to experience everything Target has to offer. But hey, 3 hours is better than no hours.

Here's a big shout out to my G.F.'s who made my Target experience in G.F. so much fun. YOU ROCK G.F.'s !!!

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Lisa Answers Some Questions

1. If you could have an endless supply of any food, what would it be and why?
Bothwell Cheese. It's the thing I miss the most when I'm away from home. And it's kind of expensive, so it'd be a little easier on the pocketbook.

2. If you were an animal what would you be and why?
A Sea Turtle. I'd have the best of both worlds....some land and some I'd live for a long time and I could tuck my head into my shell during awkward situations

3. If you could only describe yourself using three words, what three words would you use?
Compassionate, idealist, honest.

4. If you could be a super hero who would you be and why?
I'd like to read people's thoughts..... Could you imagine? Everyone would be so much more approachable because they couldn't hide behind their insecurities anymore. But I'd filter out any bad thoughts they'd think about me of course. That could get hard on the ol' self esteem.

5. What is the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you?
Oh man, walking around for a day not realizing that one side of my nursing bra was undone.....and the time I shnartzed on a walking path but I didn't realize it was a walking path. Then later that day the 18 people I was with walked right over 'the spot'. That's a great one for Seventeen magazine.

6. What is one of your biggest pet peeves and why?
when tension fills a's just so darn awkward. And insensitive sucks when people get hurt, ya know?

7. Out of red, green, blue, yellow and orange which one is your favorite color?
If you chose red what is one of your favorite hobbies?
If you chose green what is your favorite place?
If you chose blue what is one favorite memory?
If you chose yellow what is your dream job?
If you chose orange it’s a wild card and you can tell us anything about yourself!
One favorite memory of mine......climbing the agricore grain elevator with Drew. I've never been so scared in my life, but I was too in love to know better. I was on top of the every sense of the word.

Friday, October 12, 2007

7 Burning Questions for Bill

7 burning questions for Bill:

1. If you could have an endless supply of any food, what would it be and why?
Farmer Joel's's gotta be the best corn in the whole world...sweet as sugar and the texture...oh, it's all about the texture.

2. If you were an animal what would you be and why?
A brown cow. Then I could make all the chocolate milk I could drink.

3. If you could only describe yourself using three words, what three words would you use?
Optimistic, enthusiastic, and determined

4. If you could be a super hero who would you be and why?
"Fertilizer Bill"....I would grow the biggest corn and strawberries you've ever laid your eyes on.

5. What is the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you?
I let one rip in front of a bunch of dinner guests. It was one of those moments where you're not sure if it was too obvious and you need to say 'pardon moi' or if you can just pretend that nothing happened. I did the latter.

6. What is one of your biggest pet peeves and why?
Bread crusts.....and getting 'the wolf'. It truly is an itch that cannot be scratched. Dick Dick told me to use Gold Bond. It's the only thing that works for him.

7. Out of red, green, blue, yellow and orange which one is your favorite color?

If you chose red what is one of your favorite hobbies?
If you chose green what is your favorite place?
If you chose blue what is one favorite memory?
If you chose yellow what is your dream job?
If you chose orange it’s a wild card and you can tell us anything about yourself!

My favorite place would have to be the farm. Tractors, dirt, corn...what more does a guy need?

I tag Crystal, Jester, and Lisa.

Friday, October 05, 2007

Jester's Been Tagged

Jester's been tagged by Crystal and boy is he happy about that.
Here are the rules: You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. (If you don't have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.) When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post and then choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged, and to read your blog.

C......cuddle time. I'm soft, round, and I love to cuddle.

H.....Hero. I'm Bill's hero

A.....Anger management...something I need to work on. I'm not proud of it.

N.....Never stop havin' fun....except when I'm angry (see above).

C.....Curls. I've got some pretty sweet curls going on. My mom keeps threatening that she's gonna cut them off, but I enjoy the attention that they give me. Please comment below to support my 'save Jester's curls' campaign.

H.....Hero. Yeah, I'm pretty much everyone's hero.

O.....Oversize. I'm big for my age, but I've come to accept it. Sometimes it gets me down, but I'm learning to accept the way God made me. Besides, some kinds of food are just way too good to pass up, don't you agree?
Jester tags Noah & Ari.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Bill's Been Tagged

Bill's been tagged by Heather. Here are the rules:

You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. (If you don't have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.) When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post and then choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don't' forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged, and to read your blog.

P........Party Animal....nuff said.

E........Extremely Handsome.

T........Talkative.....yeah, I can talk your ear off.

E........Extremely Handsome.

R........R&R...gotta have it. All work and no play makes Bill an unhappy boy.

Bill tags Crystal and Charis

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

High Heel Virgin

I've never owned a pair of high heels until now. It's not like I didn't like them. In fact I think high heels are hot. But I never thought they were my style. They didn't suit me. I'm growing up I guess. I never thought the day would come, but I'll admit it - I'm starting to like womanly clothes and accessories.

Yesterday I went on a shopping trip with my favorite shopping partner, Crystal. We were in Sears. There was a 'surprise' sale going on. Bill needed some new shoes so I went hunting for him. Well, Crystal thought I needed some new shoes so she went hunting for me. She went into some back room. It was dimly lit and full of racks of know, the leftovers. She comes out with a pair of heels. "Here Lise, try these. Size 10!" I tried them on. It was like Cinderella trying on her glass slipper. They fit perfectly. And they were actually pretty cute. The sale price was $14.99, but with the surprise sale you could take off another 40% if you had a Sears card. We didn't have a Sears card, but if you signed up for one then you could take the 40% off plus an additional $10 off your purchase. Crystal signed up for a Sears card and then used it to purchase my first pair of high heels....they were free when all was said and done. It was meant to be.

I got home, anxious to show my new heels off to Drew. I was a little nervous. I'm turning over a new leaf in the fashion department. Would Drew like it? I thought I should practice a little. I walked around the kitchen with my heels. Heel, toe, heel, toe. This was a lot tougher than I thought. Bill and Jester were snickering at me from the living room. Bill pipes up, "looks like you're REALLY trying. Try not to look like you're not trying. Those heels lose their effect when you try so hard." Sheesh, how would you know Bill, I thought. I heard Drew's truck pull in the driveway. I slipped my high heels back on and posed as womanly as I could by the door. He walked in and I said in my most high-heeled-woman voice, "Hello lovah." Let's just say the high heels went over very well (as long as I stood stationary).

This is a big shout out to the BEST shopping partner a girl could ever have. Crystal, you are the full package. We know each other's tastes. We're honest with each other - You can tell me, "those jeans make your thighs look huge," and I appreciate it. We don't ever split up when we shop. We love each other's company. We both laugh whenever we see the store 'Sirens'....wee woo wee woo wee woo. We encourage each other to buy the right thing. We give out compliments freely and really mean it. I can't wait to do it again. Love you, sis.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

How about 'dem apples?

Jester is....clownish, cute, chubby, bright, talkative, redheaded, curious, emotional, boyish, hungry, thirsty, energetic, giggly, wiggly, adventurous, fearless, book loving, healthy, quarky, rebellious, sweet, friendly....did i mention chubby? I love you, man. Just counting my blessings.

Saturday, September 08, 2007

Canning Confessions

I was introduced to the world of canning about 5 years ago. It's taken me until now to realize what sort of darkness is lurking around in my heart.....I hold on to my canned goods with clenched fists. I do not want to share my canning. The thought of having to share my canned goods makes my heart race a little....I get a little panicked. I would consider myself a pretty generous person, but when it comes to this I'm like scrooge mcduck.

Crystal was kind enough to come over to help me cook up a batch of liquid gold (aka salsa). She was kind enough to bring some extra tomatoes because I didn't have enough from my own garden. She was kind enough to donate her time and the use of her food chopper. And I kept thinking, "is she going to want half of the jars? because I want all of them." Seriously, how low can a human being get? Then in the middle of making the salsa we realized we were 3 cups short of tomatoes. My neighbor and I are on good terms so I quickly went over and asked her if she could spare a few tomatoes from her garden. She said yes, of course, and even gave me an icecream pail to pick them in to. On my way home I stopped dead in my tracks, "I'm going to have to give her a jar of salsa," I realized, "it's the only right thing to do." I even asked Crystal if I should sacrifice a jar to thank my neighbor for her contribution. "Weeellll," Crystal said, "that's a tough one." She knew my dilema. While Crystal and I were chopping the veggies I casually asked, "so do you want half the jars? or are you making salsa for yourself this year?" I held my breath as I waited for her answer. "I'll take a jar or two," she replied. SWEET! I thought. She wanted less jars than I had anticipated. Then I could definitely afford to give one to my neighbor.

I know what you must be thinking. And I hope you can at least respect my honesty. One motto I try and live by is, "Shine some light on your darkness." So I am shining a big spot light on this very ugly darkness. I want to change....and hopefully this is a start. I will diliberately share my canning from now own. I will hold nothing back. I will share until there is no more canning selfishness left in me.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

2 Roomies - 1 Roomie = 1 Roomie

I'm down to one roomie. Jester has been our room mate for past 399 days. Yesterday he moved down the hall to greener pastures. Jester was a good room mate for the most part. It started off okay, but once you live with someone for a while you get kind of annoyed with their habits. Sometimes he would call out in his sleep or just start talking to himself. Scared me every time. He is also a habitual night snacker. Seriously, he'd be up at 1 am wanting to order pizza. Me & Drew didn't appreciate this. Who needs a meal in the middle of the night? We didn't say this to him, but we're a little concerned about his waistline. Everyone keeps telling me that he'll thin out, but it doesn't seem to be happening. Bill struggled with his weight too, but not quite like this. Pizza doesn't help the situation. Another problem was that Jester is somewhat of a light sleeper. If Drew or I would go to bed after him we had to be as quiet as a mouse. If we'd wake him up we'd hear about it the next morning. Sheesh.

So Drew and I talked to Bill. We asked him if he wanted to room with Jester for a while. Well, if you don't want to room with him, why would I want to? Bill asked. Good point Bill. Good point. So Bill and Drew got to work in the basement. Bill would have a room of his own in a few weeks. Bill worked harder than anyone. He drilled, hammered, and even tried his hand at painting. He definitely put in his fair share of sweat equity.

On the day of the big move there was excitement in the air. Bill was up early and was waiting for me to rise and shine so we could get on with the move. He handed me my coffee. Get going, mom! Said Bill, We've got a busy day ahead of us. Jester, on the other hand, was a little reserved and withdrawn that day. He takes change hard, while Bill welcomes it.

The move went smoothly. We had a little trouble putting Bill's bed back together, but we finally got it. That night I went downstairs to say good night to Bill. He was already all tucked in with a huge smile on his face. Sure is satisfying putting your own roof over your head, he said to me, I just love the smell of new carpet and fresh paint. Then I went upstairs to say good night to Jester. This isn't going to go as well, I thought. Jester was also lying in his bed. Good night, I said, I Hope you enjoy your 1st sleep in your new room. He gave me a weak smile. I will, he said, but change is never easy for me.

Change is good, I thought to myself as I walked out of his room. Drew and I were excited to embrace this change. I closed Jester's door and went into our now very spacious bedroom. I turned every light on, rummaged loudly through my dresser to find my pj's, and even sneezed outloud just because I could. Drew came running in and did a canon ball on the bed. HEY! he said loudly, HOWZ IT GOING? Then he jumped up and down on the bed and tried to convince me to join him so he could try and double bounce me. I know we're excited to get rid of our roomie, but really Drew, let's try and show a little sympathy to Jester, I said trying to hid my smile. But I couldn't help myself. I jumped on the bed and tried to double bounce Drew before he could get me. YIPPEE!

That night we all had the best sleep we'd had in long time. Jester was a new person in the morning. He was surprised to discover that he enjoyed his own space. Bill slept in longer than ever before since the basement was dark and quiet and wonderful, as he put it. He quite enjoyed that. In the end we're all better off because of the big move.

Monday, July 23, 2007

Revenge of Bill VBerg

Bill and I have had our differences this week. I feel like he's been carrying this grudge against me for several days now. While I was cleaning up after lunch he disappeared. The house was very quiet. I became concerned. "Where's Bill?" I thought. I assumed he must be in his room reading something from his extensive library. I checked but No, he wasn't there. Then I checked in my room. There was Bill with this ridiculously smug look on his face. He sabatoged my entire closet. "Bill!" I exclaimed, "Why would you do this to me?" I had utter disbelief and shock on my face. Bill looked sheepish at first, then regretful. Then he ran into his room, closed the door, and burst into tears. I looked over at Jester for some support. He looked up from his book, shrugged his shoulders, and kept reading.

"Jester, What's up with Bill?" I asked him, "He's been acting so strange lately." Jester just kept reading. I sighed and went back to the kitchen to finish cleaning up. I'd clean up the closet later.

Suddenly Jester emerged from the bedroom with purpose in his step and sporting his 'Peace Officer' shirt. "Oh boy, here we go," I thought. Don't ask me why, but Jester does this every time the peace around him is disturbed. He takes conflict pretty seriously as you can see. "I think I know what's wrong with Bill," He said confidently, "He's feeling threatened by all the homecomings this week. You've suddenly gained your 2 best friends back. Bill is feeling left out."

I thought about it for a bit. "But Bill knows that he's my#1. I mean, this has never been an issue before, has it?" I asked Jester. "No, it hasn't, but this kind of homecoming has never happened before either. 2 at once. He's been acting up because he craves your attention." Jester replied. "Well, I suppose you're right." I sighed. "I'd better go talk to him and make more of an effort for some Q.T. with Bill." "Hey, that's what I'm here for," said Jester, "just trying to keep the peace."
I quietly knocked on Bill's door. "yeah, come in," said Bill. I went in. His eyes looked a little puffy and his cheeks were rosey from crying. I just looked at him, then ran over to him and gave him a giant hug. He hugged me equally as hard. We were both crying by now. No words needed to be said. We both knew that we understood each other. " I love you, Bill" I said. "I love you too," he replied.

Monday, July 09, 2007

Jester's 1st Annual - Declared a Success!

Bill is relieved July 8th has come and gone. Jester was really getting under his skin with all his perfect party agenda. As for me? I kinda have the 'day after Christmas' feeling. The week leading up to the big 1st annual was full of preparation and anticipation. Jester settled down a little after I had a heart to heart with him. "Let's focus on what's important, okay Jes?" I told him. He didn't say anything, but I knew he understood me. He knew I was right and he had been taking things a little too far. I decided to put my foot down a little with him and make some decisions for him. "I've decided to make a teddy bear cake because you remind me of a teddy bear." I said to Jester with confidence. "Aw, come on! I don't exactly consider that a compliment." said Jester. I gave him a look that made him zip it.

The day of the party arrived. Jester didn't sleep very well that night. He was too excited. The guests started to arrive. All of his closest buddies were there. I could see him starting to relax and enjoy himself. I was so glad, because after all, this was a celebration of his life. The fun began.......

Papa gave some wicked airplane rides. I've never seen someone be an airplane and a lazyboy at the same time. That takes talent, folks. I think I even saw him give Nana an airplane ride.

Here's Jester getting cozy with one of his party guests. "Why is Jester sitting on Ari's lap?" Bill whispered to me. I shrugged my shoulders, "Not sure, Bill. Just let him be. It's his birthday and if he wants to sit on Ari I suppose he can."

Here's Jester stuffin' his face with some good eats. I made his favorites.......who can resist perfectly steamed green beans slathered in butter? I sure can't.

And here is the teddy bear cake inspired by Jester himself. Bill and Papa thought Jester would appreciate a teddy bear with a brightly burning candle right where it counts. My teddy bear went from cute to questionable. They were giggling like a bunch of school girls. "Okay you guys.....seriously...STOP IT! We're not embarrassing Jester on his 1st annual." I said above the giggles.

Here's the birthday boy enjoying his cute teddy bear cake. I think he secretly enjoys resembling a teddy bear. I mean, you can't ever get upset at a teddy bear....and every one's instinct is to hug teddy bears. It's a sweet life.

The party was a success. Someone even commented to me that they could tell Jester is special to us. "He is," I said with a grin. And what's important is that he knows he's special....our little teddy bear is now 1.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Have You Seen This Man?

Missing: Drew Vanden Berg
Height: a perfect 6' 0"
Weight: a very trim 185lbs
Hair: distinguished red & white
Eyes: sexy blue

Responds to the name Drew.

Please contact Lisa ASAP if you've seen this man. She's suffering from a broken heart.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Jester's 1st Annual 'Birthday Bash'

Jester's first annual 'Birthday Bash' is approaching quickly. Let's just say he's a little stressed right now. He wants it to be a perfect party....he said it's the 'first annual' so it better be good otherwise people won't come to the 'second annual'. Typically Jester is a fairly laid back individual, but ever since this party planning has been going on, well, he's just a little difficult to be around. I told him he just needs to relax. No, Hez isn't going to care what color the balloons are or if you have the perfect 'theme'. Hez and all his other pals just want to hang out with him....celebrate the day. 'What about a Curious George theme?' I asked him. 'Na, George is just too.....curious,' said Jester. 'Okay, what about Bob the Builder or Lightning McQueen?,' I suggested. 'Na, that's way too......'Billish',' He replied. And never mind picking a theme....the food, the food, the food. Talk about high stress. 'Did you see the food at Zaiah's first annual? Like, wow. Talk about a tough act to follow,' Jester said to me. Okay, now I was starting to feel unneccesary pressure. I suggested that we just serve his favorite is his birthday. Well, he'd think about it, he informed me. Then he went off to make some party checklists or something.

Bill and I were talking about the whole party thing last night after Jester went to bed. 'Watching Jester makes me so glad I haven't had to worry about party planning yet....i mean, i haven't even had a birthday at home yet.' said Bill. 'Yeah, that's a good way to look at it,' I said, 'We just need to be patient with Jester. If it's a big deal to him, it's a big deal to us...I mean, after all, we are family, right Bill?' 'Yeah, you're right,' Bill sighed, 'between you and me, i can't wait until July 8th is over.' 'Oh, Bill.' I said, 'it'll be okay.' Here I was, trying to console Bill, but really I was consoling myself.....this might be a long week.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Green Glitter Gone Wrong (along with a few other things)

Bill thought it'd be a great idea to make a little 'homecoming craft' for nana and papa. The only craft I could think of were egg carton caterpillars. 'Sweet,' Bill said, "Let's get started.'

So I got out all the supplies. Bill's creative juices were flowing. Put some glue, glitter, pipe cleaners and googly eyes in Bill's hands and look out. ' Genius!' Bill shouted as he tossed some glitter on top of the glue. Then he proceeded to put eyes on the caterpillar's back. ' It's scriptural,' he said. 'Like the creatures around the throne.' Wow, that's pretty deep Bill. Jester wanted to see what all the commotion was. Before I knew it Bill and Jester were VERY into the glitter. 'You can't have a caterpillar without glitter,' said Bill. Sheesh, i had no idea Bill was such an expert. I learned the hard way. Glitter is hard to clean up. Really hard. You see, it seems to attach itself to everything through static electricity. Bill and Jester loved all the glitter. 'It livens up the decor a little,' said Jester. 'Yeah, whatever Jester,' I replied, not really seeing the bright side.

The next day Bill and I loaded up the caterpillars. We were off to the airport to pick up my 'rents. The whole ride there Bill couldn't stop talking about the caterpillars. He was a little nervous....hoping nana and papa would love the caterpillars. I think artists can be a little insecure about their creations...especially when they're just starting out. 'Bill, they will,' I assured him, 'Just keep them in the bag. We don't want to liven up the decor in Papa's truck.'

We arrived at the airport in plenty of time. Bill and I were waiting in the observation deck anticipating the 'rents arrival. Suddenly I hear my name being paged over the intercom. 'What's up with that?' Bill asked. I contacted the info desk - it was a message to call home. I was worried. 'Oh, it's probably just Jester checking in on us,' Bill suggested. Oh Bill. The cup is always half full, isn't it? I call home. Bad news. Nana and Papa missed their flight. Something about them sitting in the wrong gate........honest mistake. Happens to everyone.

I broke the news to Bill. 'What are we going to do now? It's going to be 6 hours before they get in now,' I asked Bill. Bill is always one to think quick on his feet. 'Just let me eat grapes. I do some of my best thinking while I eat grapes,' Bill said. So he ates some grapes and then said, 'we should call Karla. I think of her as a refuge in the storm. She'll help us out.' Well, it was worth a shot. We didn't have any other good options. I found her number in the phone book, deposited my last quarter and dialed her number. No answer. 'Let's just take a chance and drive over there,' said Bill, keeping his cool.

So off we the other end of the city not knowing if Karla and Co would be there or not. We pull up onto her driveway and behold! There she was. What a beautiful sight. 'And you were worried. Sheesh!' says Bill from the backseat. Once we got settled in I realized why this was such a 'refuge in the storm'. Bill was surrounded by ladies. 4 cute ones at that. Bill really hit it off with one in particular. She wouldn't stop squeezing his legs. He loved it....i could see it on his face. Oh Bill, it's always about the ladies with you......especially the older ones. sheesh.

Not only did we have good company (VERY good company according to Bill), we also had some great eats. Perogies, farmer sausage, salad, and Bill's favorite - strawberries....not to mention some moist carrot cake. Things couldn't have turned out better for us.

Oh yeah, and my 'rents made it home eventually. They loved Bill's caterpillars. Papa even caught on to the 'scriptural eyes' without any prompting. Sweet, eh Bill?

So here's a big shout out to the Penner's from me and Bill! THANKS A BUNCH!

Monday, June 04, 2007

New Feature

I added a new feature to my blog....and you have to scroll all the way down to the bottom of the page to see it. It's my 'Lisa Likes List'. I was hoping it would be at the top on the side, but NOOOOO. It's not.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Sailor 'J'

Rainy day fun is all I can call it. Jester spotted the ol' sailor suit in Bill's closet. He begged me if he could try it on. Drew's first sailor suit. My, it's a dandy. Must be the equivalent to a girl trying on her mom's wedding dress or something....pretty special moment. I was a little concerned about Jester's self-esteem.....I mean, he's not exactly the trimmest guy around and what if I couldn't zip it up? "Aw, what the heck," I thought, "it's worth a shot. It's got a little stretch in it." So I helped Jester slip into it....well, actually I wouldn't exactly say he 'slipped' into it....more like squeezed and poured into it. But, we got it zipped up. Well, actually we only got it zipped up about half way. "Perfect fit!" I exclaimed, hoping he wouldn't notice. Jester insisted I get the camera and take a few pics. Bill totally egged him on...."Sexy, sexy, sexy!" he kept chanting. Jester totally ate it up. He tried doing a few model moves, but that darn suit was too tight. Here he is. Actually, he does look kinda sexy. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, right Drew?

p.s. Dad, we're waiting for those sailor hats.....hurry up before Sailor J outgrows his suit.
FYI - check out Bill's sailor suit photo shoot in our blog on 2005!

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Summer Palace

So mom and dad are off in St. Pete's....rubbing it in our faces with their online photo album. Thanks, guys. Sheesh. Bill and Jester are a little POed to put it lightly. So I decided instead of wallowing in self pity (which Bill, Jester, and myself do on a daily basis) I'd post a few of our own pictures. For your info, we also were at the summer palace....okay, so there weren't any 300 year old "natural" fountains, but there was a kick @$$ bonfire and some really cool deer poop. we even had a little picnic of our own. here it is in all it's your heart out 'Peterhof".

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

False Paska Modesty

I know easter has come and gone, but something really struck me about the easter season and I just can't shake it. It all started when Mama V stopped in to drop off some paska buns. 'Wow!' I said, "pretty ambitious, making paska buns, hey?". "Yeah," she said non-chalantly, " They didn't really turn out, just throw them out if you don't like them." As soon as she left I made myself a cup of tea and sat down to enjoy a paska bun slathered in icing and sprinkles. "mmmmm," I thought to myself, " these paska buns are pretty rockin'. She made it sound like they'd taste as good as a bowling ball." Mama V, just admit it, you make some pretty mean paska.

That's not where my story ends. I was at my mom's one thursday afternoon before the big easter weekend. She had 'just whipped up' some paska buns, as she put it. "Wow, mom!" I said, "paska buns, hey? That's pretty ambitious." "Yeah," she shrugged, "they're not that great. They didn't really turn out." They looked just dandy to me. I was up for a taste test. So I got the paska bun ready for consumption. I spread some icing on it and sprinkled some sprinkles on top. One bite and I was in paska heaven. "Mom, these are awesome!" I said. "Really?" my mom said like she was in some serious denial. Mom, just admit it, your paska buns rock.

Sorry folks, that's not where this story ends. I was at Elf Hamm's house the week before Easter and low and behold, she served some paska bread. Everyone was oooing and aaahing over this paska bread and going for seconds (and thirds). "Elf! This paska bread is soooo good," I said. "Really?" she asked, " I thought it turned out a little on the heavy side." Oh please. Elf, seriously...this was some seriously rockin' paska. But then, I found myself telling someone about the time I had made paska. "oh, I had made some paska buns last year, but they didn't turn out that great. They were a little on the heavy side."

I'm hoping I've shed a little light on this terrible thing I like to call 'false paska modesty'. We women need to be able to say that our paska is good.....that it is enjoyable. The paska I made last year was good, all right? Dang good. Yeah, It pretty much rocked. There, I said it. And you can too.

Saturday, May 05, 2007

Writer's Block

I've been struggling lately..... I've been neglecting my blog....i'm losing sleep over it.....okay, I'll admit it. I've got writer's block. I'm feeling a little pressure to put out a good post. I'm feeling pressure to be funny, witty, creative. I've discovered I've got quite a blog following out there. My mom will tell me, 'so and so LOVES reading your blog. they think you're so funny'. It's getting to me, okay? I've told myself, 'just don't try, then you'll be funny.' People are only funny if they don't know they're funny....

So I decided to talk to Bill about it. He always has some good words of advice and encouragement and besides, he's a pretty funny guy himself. This is what Bill told me, "well, a wise person once told me, 'always keep them wanting more'. Blog only when you're feeling the groove...When you can bring da funk. Quality, not quantity, capeesh? oh yeah, and just be yourself. It's who you do best."

Oh Bill, you always know what to say...wise beyond his years, isn't he?

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Who's Your Stylist?

I was talking to Bill last week about getting a know, a real haircut. I was ready for a change. My last hairstylist did a pretty butch job on my hair. The naked eye wouldn't have been able to see it, but I had to get my scissors out to do a few touch ups. That's the problem with having curly hair...often the stylist won't notice that she's done an uneven looks fine when your hair is curly but as soon as you straighten it. Look out, girlfriend. Nasty. Anyways, to get on with my conversation with Bill he said he LOVES his stylist, Grace. He's referred her to Hez, who also swears by her. She's had many years experience and she knows curly hair. I told Bill that him and Hez both had pretty stylin' cuts and I was willing to give Grace a shot.
Now, as I said earlier I was ready for a change so I asked Bill and Jester for some suggestions. I respect their sense of style and so I respect their opinions. Their suggestions got a little out of hand. I'm trying to stay hip and current, but for goodness sakes, boys! A Mohawk? I'll admit, they almost had me convinced. They kept chanting, 'Mohawk! Mohawk! Mohawk!'

This morning I still had no idea how I should cut my hair. Time was running out. I was beginning to wonder if the mohawk was for me. It was the only thing that I could come up with and my appointment with Grace was only 1 hour away. Then I thought about her...Crystal. Stylin', beautiful, Crystal. Instant inspiration! I wanted a sheek, sexy cut. A few bangs, a lot of layers. Bill, I have to agree with you. Grace knows curly hair. She is now my stylist as well. I'm sure you are all wondering - Jester and Bill were a little disappointed that I didn't go with the mohawk, but when I walked in the door after my cut Bill said, 'mommy, you're cute!'. So, here's the new me!

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Extreme Makeover, Blog Edition

You have to admit my blog kicks some you know what. It looks pretty sweet. Drew is getting a little concerned however....i mean, i'm getting pretty good at this blogging thing. He even called me a blog 'expert'. I guess I am...did you see that i now have 'links'? And I have a pretty sweet template. Yeah, I'm just trying to keep up with my buddy Heather. She's the best blogging 'expert' i know. So enjoy the makeover! I sure am.

This One's For You...Ya, You Know Who You Are

All right, let's get real. Life is just not as much fun without my fun lovin' sis-in-law around. Thursday suppers at mom L's are a little dull, Bill's getting a little boring without 'danya' to teach him the next trick, and I'm just plain ol' lonely. My buddy isn't here to talk about recipes with, to share the same excitement for shopping, and to make survivor night worth watching. I've gone on this long without her, but I just don't know if I can do it anymore. To make things worse my 'rents bought their tickets to Russia yesterday. Oh, i think i did a pretty good job pretending to be happy for them, but deep down inside i'm raging with envy. And did they invite me along? Nooooo. They sure didn't. They'll be off gallivanting through St. Pete's with my gal Crystal and I'll be home...crystal will only be but a smiling face on my refrigerator door.

My food has lost it's taste, my laugh has lost it's ring, my eyes have lost their sparkle. Nothing can take your place. Nothing will make me feel better until I see you again. So here's a shout out to you, Crystal: "YOU ROCK AND I MISS YOU LIKE NO BODY'S BIZZNESS!"

In your honor I made a rockin' batch of dill dip for supper. I will sip a diet cherry coke and eat my dill dip and think of just won't taste the same without you here.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Bill! It's Dick Dick!

The inevitable has happened. I was looking at a picture of Dick Dick on the computer the other day and casually asked Bill, "who's that?". My heart sunk as he stared blankly at the screen. 'Dick Dick! That's Dick Dick!' I almost shouted. "Remain calm," i told myself, "maybe it's just the new hat Dick Dick is sporting. It's probably confused Bill". Just to be sure I've decided to make a series of flashcards for Bill. Pictures of Dick Dick, Danya, and Arlink wearing various styles of clothing...some pictures with hats, some without, some with sunglasses...well, you get the idea. Dick Dick, Danya, Arlink...Bill will not forget who you are if I have anything to do with it. Absence WILL make the heart grow fonder. We will deligently study those flashcards every night. If you have any other ideas, please let me know.

So I was writing in one of my last posts that Bill is the Butterfly waiting to emerge out of his cocoon. Well, by no means is he a butterfly yet, but nature is definitely running it's course with a little help from moi. I'm encouraging Bill to express his emotions. Often he keeps them all bottled up inside. While we were in Orlando visiting an organization that will remain annonymous (policies, people, policies!) Bill expressed himself beautifully when he opposed the idea of going inside. Progress, Bill. It's progress. The next step is to learn a little R E S P E C T. Yes Bill, even butterflies show respect.

Here is Bill showing his immense displeasure:

Monday, March 05, 2007

Don't Be Shy! Introduce Yourself!

Bill and I were reading my friend's blog 'Our Life Voyage' and liked her idea of asking people who read her blog to introduce themselves. So if you read our blog, please! Introduce yourself! Bill would like to meet you.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Bill the Butterfly

It's been 2 weeks since we arrived home from C.R. It's been a long 2 weeks to be honest. Bill just hasn't been himself and Jester is just moping around the house feeling sorry for himself. He wishes he was back on the beach surrounded by costa rican women. I think Bill has been searching for himself. I think the trip really affected him....I can't quite put my finger on it yet. He just seems like he's not satisfied anymore. Maybe he's been ruined for the ordinary. It's too early to tell the full extent of how he's been affected, but I plan on keeping close tabs on him. It seems like the only thing that cheers him up these days is his 'precious'. I kid you not, that is what he named his blankie. He just sits in bed and strokes his 'precious'. I wonder what he's thinking.....He's the kind of kid that you just don't want to pry too much. I see him as a butterfly that needs to emerge from it's cocoon. You can't rush these things. Let nature run it's course. Actually...I think he's still a caterpillar that needs to make itself a cocoon. Actually, he's a caterpillar that hasn't even THOUGHT about making the cocoon. Oh Bill, time will tell, time will tell.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Costa Rica according to Jester

According to me, Costa Rica is Heaven on Earth. The culture, the people, the sights, the sweet hot weather. Life couldn't be better. The women absolutely adored me. Seriously, they couldn't get enough of me. I didn't even do anything. I would just smile and they would go crazy. It was awesome. I was the most loved man in Costa Rica. I would go back in a second.

Another reason I liked the trip so much is that I got a sweet tan. I've been wearing short sleeved shirts - white ones - to show it off. Another perk was that my mom was constantly worried that I was dehydrated and kept wanting to feed me. I didn't argue with her. Sweet, I thought. I tried to look thirsty and it worked most of the time. I think I gained a few pounds. The pounds I gained I think my brother Bill lost.....more on that later.

Here is me on the beach working on my sweet tan:
My mom had a pretty good time too, but she kept talking about some 'auntie danya'....auntie danya would like this and auntie danya would like that and how much she missed auntie danya. Who the heck is auntie danya? Whoever she is she must be somebody really special. Sheesh. Speaking of special people here is a pic of me with my kindred spirit, Colin. We totally hit it off. We didn't talk much, but he would often give me a knowing smile. I miss not seeing him every day, but I guess there's always church.
I thoroughly enjoyed my time, unlike my brother Bill. I don't know what his problem was. He didn't like the heat, he didn't like the food, he didn't like the bugs, he even didn't like how friendly people were to him. I told him to take a chill pill....stick it out for 2 weeks and if need be, to just pretend he's having fun. I think he was just jealous that the women liked me so much and not him, but I didn't rub it in. His attitude just really stunk. I mean, I can't help it that they named a soft drink after me, right? Costa Rica just agreed with me. I've even adopted the Costa Rican saying, "Pura Vida!". For those of you who don't know spanish it means the pure life. I was living the pure life for 2 short weeks. My 2 weeks of fame are over...they are but a distant memory now. Whenever Bill gets a little fresh with me I just go to my happy place. I go to Costa Rica - at least in my mind I do. Bill just doesn't even understand. He never will. He really missed out, but in a way I'm glad. Costa Rica is mine to treasure forever.

Just so there are no hard feelings (because Bill might read this), here is a pic of me and Bill hanging out in Costa Rica. It wasn't all bad, was it Bill?:

Thursday, January 04, 2007

The True Meaning of Christmas....according to Bill

Christmas has come and gone and with it it brought a lot of changes in the VBerg household. A new side of Bill has come out and I don't know if Christmas is to blame.....but I guess I just don't know what else to blame it on. Could it simply be the sinful nature of the human race? I'm sure you are wondering what the new side of Bill could possibly be. He is already so wonderfully complex. Well, where should I begin?

I'll begin with the day after our Christmas festivities were over. Bill was so excited about his red Case Tractor with not just 2 back tires, but 4. It's a beaut, let me tell you. I can't remember the exact details, but let's just say Bill and I exchanged some words. The next thing I know he's kicking over his cherished tractor and throwing around the baler and any other implement he could get his hands on. So I told him, "Bill, you are forgetting the reason for the season. Mary's boy child, Jesus Christ, was born on Christmas Day. Sheesh. What's with the attitude?". Bill knew he was out of line.... we both knew it, so that's where I left it. I figured he'd come around.

Unfortunately that's not where this story ends. All of a sudden greed has entered in. Bill began coveting Jester's stocking stuffers. I can hardly blame him. They're pretty darn cool. Anyways, that's besides the point. Jester was minding his own business, playing with his new squishy trucks when Bill's greed got the best of him. He sneaks up behind Jester and steals the trucks right out from under him. It was like stealing candy from a baby. I couldn't believe it. My Bill? Stealing? So I told him to give the trucks back to Jester. He reluctantly returned ONE of the trucks to Jester. Sheesh, I thought. But, I didn't want to push it. It had been a long day already. I was busily preparing lunch for Bill when out of the corner of my eye I see my shoe in Bill's hand. What in the world is he up to now? All of a sudden, "WACK!". He had hit Jester square in the face, leaving him helpless and crying...and totally stunned. In fact, we all were. I think even Bill was stunned at what had just happened. I think he had a full circle moment right then. He realized that he had let the World's 'Spirit of Christmas' get into his heart....a spirit that is all about how much I can get and doing whatever it takes to get it. As I consoled Jester I really felt that no words needed to be said. I knew that Bill was remorseful and that was all the punishment he needed right then. Later on him and I had a good talk. He told me that from now on he wanted to make a conscious effort to be less materialistic.....he wanted to fight in the opposite spirit of greed. He wanted to be more giving. Suddenly a little twinkle appeared in his eye. "Jesus is the reason for the season, cliche, but true," He said. I agree, Bill, I agree.